as pleasant as profitable

In the new Sherlock Holmes mystery-action-adventure, Jude Law and RDJ are presenting us with a bit more badass than we've previously attributed to the dandy Watson/Holmes team. Here, Holmes boxes (shirtless...which isn't fallible, but i think made me blush in spite of the darkened theater) and Watson is a decorated military man. Not sure how true that keeps to Sir Doyle's character portrayals, as I've never read the series, not even the Hounds of Baskervilles, and probably won't anytime soon. So, I'll just have to base everything I know about the dynamic duo off a film by Guy Ritchie.

Below is a set photo of Holmes'..er..home office. Mind, the lighting was a little dimmer and dustier on film than you see here. During scenes set in this space my eyes stayed busy devouring the dec. One of my favorite pieces from Holmes' office was a bust depicting a crying baby, trés comic grotesque. He also had a darling painted portrait of someone who looked a lot like Charles Darwin, but whoever it was appeared to be daydreaming. Watson's office, by contrast, was a pale and stark blue-green. A sickly, soft sort of color. On his mantle there was an infant's skeleton, which would be quite the oddity. And otherwise, lots of brass instruments for this and that. If you were to contrast the two characters based on their possessions, you might ascertain that, that while Watson has the medical or forensic end of the detective game covered, Holmes, a people-reader, has as much of an intellectual curiosity in human sentiment. Watson and Holmes had a psychological relationship (and conflict) with one another that reminded me of Dr. Wilson and House (of House M.D., of course). The productions don't share any of the same credits, but someone must be a fan. I learned that writer Simon Kinberg is also responsible for Mr. and Mrs. Smith, which would explain the high banter levels, as well as the love/hate dynamic between Holmes and Rachel McAdams' character. The fact that he's a crime fighter and she's a thief reminds me of Leob's classic Selina Kyle and Bruce Wayne, who suffered from similar personal and professional conflicts.

I noticed that two different villain cronies had the same industrial light fixture in their respective evil workspaces. I liked it and I'd happily accept it as an alternative to our ubiquitous florescent lighting or the track halogens that burn heat. I checked and there are not really bumble bees in the tile and fleur-de-lis on the carpet in Westminster Palace. I googled "parliament+bees+tile" and learned something new from wikipedia about an elizabethan poem called "The Parliament of Bees." It's allegorical, of course. Also, took a look at images of the House of Lords and the House of Commons, neither have blue carpet at all. Not that it's an issue, except maybe the fleur-de-lis, that's just sloppy. No British governmental building is going to install French blue carpet with traditionally French ornamentation, but that's a very knit-picky thought.


Overall, the movie is fun-times. The story gets a little over silly at certain points. The plot twists were not a strong suit and the central mystery was a mythological hybrid so overworked it became painful and moronic, in spite of the writers embarassing attempt at something demonic. Like, most of the "black magic" markings that the bad guy was scribbling looked like hobo signs. They would have been better off being based in hieroglyphics. It looked like the designer had maybe researched some hieroglyphics, if for no other reason than it just being more logical for a sphinx worshiping cult.

The action in some places was heavy handed, even predictable. For example: of course the bad guy is going to take his last shot at you while standing with his foot in the middle of some rope that happens to be tied to an anchor on the construction site of London's first suspension bridge. Naturally, you'll cut the extension of that rope conveniently within arm's reach which will wrap around bad dude's legs, pulling his feet from under him. Voila! Villiain taking him by surprise, looney tunes style. With that said, earlier on in the movie, there were a couple of slow-motion sequences illustrating Holmes' highly analytical combat style which were pretty damn cool. They played in hyper-dynamic slo-mo first, then followed at real time. So, you saw them twice, but I still jumped and flinched on the second go! I have a habit of dodging punches while I sit in my seat. In any case, immediately following the film's key resolution, the producers took an extra 7 or so minutes to set us up for the sequel which is likely to be as pleasant as profitable. Hopefully, I'll see it once it's been pirated. I mean, this movie can carry a sequel about as well as Underworld carried a trilogy (brilliantly..; ) ). I simply can't support milking every idea, original or otherwise, for as much profit as imaginable. It's the same kind of greed that brings on economic crises. {dislike button}